Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Parenting like a BOSS

Yesterday at Taekwondo a row of parents behind me watched me barely react as Ash fell backwards in a chair, got his finger stuck in another chair and rip a chunk of paint off the wall. No one said anything but I could see it in their eyes and the way one of the women screamed "HIS FINGER IS STUCK!! HIS FINGER IS STUCK!!" as I gently pulled his finger out of the chair and sat him down, that they were confused by my "non-reaction". It's not that I wasn't worried he would get hurt or pissed off that he was doing something he shouldn't have been doing. It's just that... well, Ash is Ash. And he's 3 years old.

This is a normal day for him- getting into shit and living his life in peril.

When Holden was my only child, I did everything in my power to prevent every minor scrape or accident, and dedicated every minute to making sure he was on his best behavior. But guess what?! It didn't work! He got hurt just like every other kid and he did stuff he wasn't supposed to do like sneak out the backdoor and run across the street to the neighbor's yard when he was only 2 years old - in the BLINK of an eye, I tell you!

When Lucas came along, I finally understood that kids will be kids and I let him do his thing. Of course I wanted to protect him and I wouldn't let him put himself in danger. But climbing and jumping and being a kid were nothing to be concerned about. When he started preschool, his teacher gave me a lecture about letting him climb on top of things because he could break his arm, break his leg, break his head, die, etc.... I know these things. I worried about these things too. But he did it anyway!

It's not a matter of discipline. My kids for the most part are pretty well-behaved and I'm not delusional. I've heard it from multiple people, even strangers. Sure I've had the occasional old woman shoot them dirty looks in the salad buffet line but some people just don't understand kids. And I leave them to their misery.

My point is, again, I let my kids be kids. If they get hurt doing something stupid, they learn not to do it again.... eventually. If they do something wrong, I take them aside and let them know. It's not anyone's place to judge or question my parenting style.

Especially when my kids are awesome.


  1. Yep, absolutely. I parent very similarly. Have you ever read "free range kids"?? You'd love it.

  2. I would say with 3 boys, you are a master in this department. :)

  3. I think you are an AWESOME mom.

  4. I'm also a fan of natural consequences.

  5. It's important for kids to have good manners and values but you can't be there to rescue them every time, otherwise how can they learn.

    Plus cuteness overrules mischievousness anyways, everyone knows that!

    LOLOL love love the entry title too.

  6. Haha, I so have this same mellowed response to my 3rd kid vs. my 1st one. Just found your blog via Trees All Dance. Loving your sense of humor. :-)